The Rules of Masturbation in Ancient Greece
While ancient Egyptians and Sumerians saw self-pleasure as an aspect of divinity, in Greece, masturbation was deemed a pastime suitable only for slaves, barbarians and women. And where do dogs fit in?
Young man depicted pleasuring himself in front of a mature woman. Kylix from around 510 B.C.E.Credit: The J. Paul Getty Museum, Villa Collection, Malibu.
Masturbation has been around for quite some time, and definitely way before we discovered the handshake. If you are not convinced, have a look at the chimpanzees, our closest living relatives.
But we are not here to discuss what’s going on in the animal kingdom. Instead, let’s dive into the stimulating history of human solo sex.
For some civilizations, masturbation was an act of creation. For example, the Sumerians believed that it was the god of water, Enki, who created the rivers Tigris and Euphrates by a simple act of ejaculation.
Solo but sacred
Ancient Egyptians took it slightly further; they saw the divine orgasm as a sort of Big Bang, for it was Atum’s busy hand that played a crucial role in the creation of the universe and the first two gods: Shu, the god of air, and Tefnut, the goddess of moisture.
The mythology has it that Atum decided to put an end to his solitude by spilling his divine seed across the surrounding emptiness. His presence was manifested by the flooding of the Nile, which was attributed to the frequency of his sacred ejaculations. The pharaohs, the intermediaries between the humans and gods, respectfully masturbated into the Nile each year during the feast of Nim to commemorate the event and to ensure good harvests.
For the two civilizations, masturbating was considered natural and, in times of solitude, a healthy substitute for standard sexual practices. The Sumerians even believed masturbating was excellent for enhancing potency. Yet masturbation was regarded totally differently by Greeks.
What men just don’t do
In ancient Greece, there was no shame in seeking services from prostitutes. After all for some prostitution was a key aspect of masculinity. There was no disgrace in being involved in extra-marital affairs either. Nor was there shame in being aroused by another man, especially if he was a beautiful boy (depending on the period and the polis).
However, when it comes to masturbation, that seemingly harmless activity was considered uncivilized in Greece, suitable only for “others”.
There is a hint in the terminology as to why the practice was considered indecent. The most commonly used verb for masturbation is “to soften” (dephesthai), while for most Greeks, male sexuality was essentially about power dynamics.
In bed, it all came down to active versus passive. Playing with oneself was seen as an act of passivity, good enough for the low-status men and the rest of the miserables lacking enkratia (self-control). A respected member of society, meaning a “real man”, could only play an active role in bed, that of the “penetrator”; hence, masturbating (or performing fellatio or cunnilingus) was viewed as an act of self-emasculation.
As civic identity was developing, it became all the more crucial especially in Athens to reinforce what it truly meant to be part of the enlightened civilization. In literature and iconography, masturbation became one of the aspects that separated the civilized from the savages.
The mythological figure of the satyr part-man, part-animal became the personification of the hideous masturbator brimming with untamed, bestial sexual energy. His sexual menu included daily masturbation, rape, sodomy, and occasional zoophilia and necrophilia. Unlike the ideal Greek man, who was often depicted with a modest-sized and usually flaccid penis (the picture of refinement), the satyr was represented with a substantial penis, often disproportionally ithyphallic, the embodiment of vulgarity and animality sported by the barbarians.
Some might have taken comfort in that message: since large genitals could be regarded as a sign of stupidity – the ancient male version of the “dumb blonde”.
“Large genitals could be viewed variously as animalistic, barbaric, useless, or ugly, which might, in turn, be associated with a lack of intelligence,” explains Kelly L. Wrenhaven, one of the leading researchers on slavery and sexuality in Classical Antiquity. “In short, oversized genitalia did not align with the aesthetic or moral ideal. For instance, both dwarves and old men might be shown with oversized genitalia.”
Putting size apart, an accomplished man was supposed to be in full control of himself and not succumb to his “physical dysfunctions”. The logic was, why would he masturbate if he had access to his wife, lovers, prostitutes, and slaves, the ultimate living tools? Slaves, who were sexually objectified and had no autonomy over their bodies, were therefore thought to excel in masturbation due to the lack of available sexual partners. In Greek comedy, masturbation was almost entirely their domain.
The lengthiest reference to masturbation is found in Aristophanes’ ‘Knights’, when slave B urges slave A to masturbate in order to give himself courage. At the end of the scene, slave A complains that he has damaged his foreskin.
Of course, we find representations of Greek men masturbating, but they primarily represent young blood (beardless) who were forgiven for their youthful lack of discipline and self-control. There are only a few surviving images that display mature men in action, and in one particular case, we see a representation of two symposiasts masturbating while two crouching dogs are expelling piles of excrement just next to them. The message was not only meant to be amusing but also clear: masturbation and defecation are equally disgusting.
Dangerous women
Masturbation was also attributed to women, who were deemed prone to non-ideal behavior and lacking self-restraint.
Greek literature and imagery commonly depicted women as sex addicts, willing to use any means to satisfy their sexual appetites. Hence, dildos (olisboi) are almost entirely associated with them, and if we were to trust ancient sources, they were most popular among wives and prostitutes.
A question remains, though: how many were used for self-pleasuring, and how many for pleasuring their “passive” husbands and clients who submitted themselves to anal penetration?
As to the visual representations, the majority of images depicting female masturbation or allusions to it seem to fall “into the category of fantasy-building for the sake of the male viewer”, since, as Wrenhaven notes, these types of images are found on symposium vessels, which was intended for a male audience.
Nevertheless, female sexuality was dangerous, and since women couldn’t be trusted, they had to be closely controlled by their guardians for their primary purpose: reproduction. Perhaps in the end, a dildo seemed like a good compromise.
Wise men and dogs
The Athenian philosopher Plato did not hide his disapproval. For him, masturbation was a depraved sickness that should be treated equally with incest.
Why so bitter? Because we are here to procreate and not waste our precious seed. Moreover, it was believed that the loss of semen could weaken a man’s body, hence masturbation was perceived as a waste of vital energy (maybe Plato had first-hand insight into the matter).
One of the rare supporters of masturbation was the 4th-century B.C.E. Greek philosopher Diogenes of Sinope, for whom masturbating was neither shameful nor a private matter. According to the ancient Greek gossip, he famously said: “If only it were so easy to soothe hunger by rubbing an empty belly”.
The philosopher “blamed” the messenger of the gods for familiarizing humankind with masturbation. The story goes: Hermes took pity on his goatish son Pan, who had been rejected by Echo, so he introduced him to the practice. The ecstatic Pan, in his turn, shared the knowledge with other lonely souls- the young shepherds.
As for Diogenes, the rebel thinker was not only eating, urinating (to state the least), and masturbating in public but was also “entertaining” the people with other sexual acts, which got him the nickname of kuōn (dog).
What was, in the beginning, meant to be an insult became a label. All his followers were henceforward known as “dogs” (Kunikoi– Cynics). The dog-like behavior or simply the lack of inhibition was seen as a direct assault on established values- it was.
The rejection of social norms and conventions was at the core of the Cynic movement, in which the body became a tool to manifest disapproval. The philosopher used his body to teach his students about feeling no shame for anything human, starting with bodily functions.
Among his most ardent followers were Crates of Thebes and his wife Hipparchia of Maroneia, who discovered the joy of public sex. Other motivated Cynic couples quickly followed suit.
Man’s true best friend
Back to masturbation. Not much changed under the Romans. Masturbation was still viewed as a shameful activity for those lacking status. Basically, any sort of sexual activity that did not involve penetration was considered uncivilized.
That said, who would think that men, including those of “refinement”, did not use their hand? The uncensored walls of Pompeii speak for themselves as in the case of the following graffito: “When my worries oppress my body, I make my left hand pour out my pent-up waters.”
Why the left hand? Because it was considered inferior to the right, and therefore more suitable for such a dirty act as masturbation.
In the same spirit Gaius Lucilius, the first Roman satirist, was the author of a playful poem in which the leading role is that of “Mutto” played by the penis, whose “girlfriend”, the left hand, comforts him by wiping away his “tears”. The later poet Martial admits to masturbating despite considering it vulgar and degrading. In his epigram, he describes how his hand has no choice but to substitute for the object of his desire, a handsome enslaved young man: “But my hand will substitute for Ganymede!” If only Ganymede knew.
